Wednesday, September 13, 2017

7 things about being a second time mother

I recently started my journey as a 2nd time mother. Things are very different from the first time I became a mother. At first, I was worried that it would be a struggle but it wasn't as bad as I thought. I find it easier to go from 1 child to 2 than from 0 to 1. But, it's just tiring. So, how is it really like for me to be a 2nd time mother?

1. Babycaring gets easier with experience

Breastfeeding, diaper changing and handling illnesses seemed much more manageable than the first time. But, days are surely busier with 2 children to handle. There are times we still questioned and asked google, but I do find it a lot easier than before. We are less stressed up, more confident and a lot chiller. Even an overflowed poo diaper on me deserved a photo first before cleaning it off.

2. A juggle between first and second child

Unlike the first time, attention is split between Emmalyn and Avalyn. It's always handling one child followed by other. There isn't much break until the girls turn in. There are also a lot of judgement needed to decide which child to attend to first. Many times, one needs to wait - whether patiently or in tears.

The good thing is Daddy is always there to help out the other. So, we often take one child each. There are both good days where both children's needs are satisfied and happy, as well as bad days where both cries and fight for attention When I'm alone taking care of both, I always remind Emma to cooperate as I'm shorthanded and outnumbered. Most of the time, it works!

3. More outings for baby

When we had Emma, we stayed home a lot so as to keep to her routine. Now, we headed out so much more with Avalyn as Emmalyn loves outings, exploration and outdoor play. So, it's sometimes easier to spend the day outside to entertain Emma than staying home. Apart from the trouble from pumping, I find more myself being more confident in handling baby on the go.

4. More patience with baby milestones

In another word, less gan cheong! Or perhaps, no time to worry? After 4 years of parenthood, I fully understand that baby does grow up really fast!! Instead of rushing Avalyn to hit the milestones, we are enjoying her at the present moment. I still get very excited to see how Avalyn grows and hit her milestones but I just have this very patient feeling knowing what will come next. Nonetheless, I do worry if we are too chill.

5. Comparison between children

It's hard not to look back and think about how Emma was when she was a baby. Subconsciously, we are comparing both. There are also many people sharing how there shared certain similarities or differences. This comparison is not exactly a bad thing, but I tried hard not to, especially since Avalyn is born slightly prematurely and every baby is different!

6. Different challenges

A friend told me, I won't have two Emma and it's so true. Avalyn behaves differently and brings about different (and more) sets of challenges. For Avalyn, we don't have problems like bottle feeding and pumping issue that we had with Emma. But, we are working to help her get used to rides on car seat and sleeping through, which Emma didn't have much problem in when she was baby.

And of course, having a toddler also brings about another set of challenges. "Please be quiet. Mei mei is sleeping." "I will come to you after I settle mei mei." Sometimes, it's harder to handle Emmalyn than Avalyn. Anyhow, it will always be my first time upbringing Emma at any age anyway! So, that's a challenge by itself!

7. Greater joy and fun

While it's more tiring than before, the amount of joy and fun is doubled! I totally love to see how the sisters interact and how both of them grow up through the months. And, it's just so sweet, when I hear Emma said: "Mama, meimei just now smiled at me" or "she held my hands!" or "Mama, mei mei is so big (grown up) now!". Even though she's pretty rough towards her at times, she seemed to enjoy witnessing her growth and celebrate her milestones like a big sister!


I know this is just the start of mothering 2 and there are just so much more ahead - the jealousy and sharing, the sisters' fights and loving cuddles, the hot-headed bicker and heart-to-heart talk! I'm praying hard to be able to upbring and manage the girls wisely!

What are your experiences as a second time mother? I would love to hear from you too!


This blog is in collaboration with Friso.

Kids learn from experiences whether big or small, good or bad. That's why Friso provides the right nutrition for your child to be strong inside to take on challenges.

To know more about Friso nutrition, connect with Friso on their website, Facebook and Instagram!

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